Do I believe that I have I have a Genderlect style? I can neither confirm or deny this question, since I feel that I do, but yet, I do not. Like many individuals I suppose of both groups studied, I find myself being very genderlect in the female way of communicating, but then in other situations, I feel that I an actually have more of a male genderlect style in my way of thinking and reacting.
My mother and I always laugh about the fact that we really think like a man in most aspects of life, but our darn female emotions still take over from time to time. I know in my career, I tend to enjoy working with men as opposed to women, because with a man, you know where you stand. If you have done something wrong, they tell you flat out, you don't have to wonder or speculate. On the other hand, where a female will usually tell you that you have done a great job, a man will not so easily convey this message to his employees.
When I worked in management, I found that I did tended to be more concerned about the women that worked for me as opposed to the men. Maybe this is reverse genderlect style, where the female manager is showing more compassion for the female employee as opposed to the male employee, since he should be stronger and more in control of his life, as we have been taught.
All I know is that, according to my daughter who is 21, the women of our generation have ruined it for her and her generation in finding a "REAL" man. This has been explained to me, numerous times, because in her quest to find a "REAL" man, there are not any out there. The women of "my generation" have raised men that are "in touch with their feelings" and that are winier and more feminine than most of her girlfriends. With that said, maybe Tanner's viewpoint of how men and women communicate may also be generational. If I place her thoughts and theories on my own marriage, she is extremely accurate to the conflict that my husband and I have had throughout our entire 26 year relationship. But, with the younger generations, maybe her theory needs to be reevaluated as the "TIMES ARE CHANGING!"
good points
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